I don't like the house in the movie "UP"

I FEEL DOWN WHEN I SEE THIS HOUSE

Mom..can I pee on the clouds?

If you have seen the movie "UP" then you know what I mean. I'm not impressed with that house in the movie.

Here are my reasons:

1. It's crappy and it's old so it breaks easily- When it hit rocks it was like chopping wood. Pieces would fall and fly off. It was crazy. I'd never ride that kind of a flying residence.

10,000 condoms were used in this film

2. It may look funny, but it's not really entertaining - Hohoho.. balloons make it fly. DUH! One match...one match can ruin it all. Or one bb gun, or one slingshot. Verdict: WEAK.

"I counted the balloons! 10,000!"

3.It does not kick ass - No weapons. No shield. No monsters in the attic. It doesn't even have a computer in it. No phone. No internet. No cable. No bathtub. It's CRAZY.


Better and/or alternative houses:

The Flying house - It's faster. It has a time machine. It's fire proof and is also shock proof. People living in it banged with the hebrews, chilled with jesus, fished with the apostles and saw Adam and Eve naked. Now beat that old house.

Thunder does not scare Corky.

Monster house - No more pesky electrolux guy to bother you. No kids who sing xmas carols even if it's like a month away. No solicitation from village kids who don't have enough money to buy their own basketball uniforms. This house protects itself. No need for a guard dog. This house kicks (and eats) ass.

"The only house that needs tictacs."

Whorehouse - No explanation needed..as this house licks ass....I mean kicks ass.

"Welcum!"

"A room is a still a room, even when there's nothin' there but gloom
But a room is not a house and a house is not a home. When the two of us are far apart. And one of us has a broken heart.... Okay I think I need to stay away from the videoke."

MAY POLL RESULTS

I know it's not 2010. But here is a poll we made for you guys and girls.

Last poll was:

WHO IS THE GAYEST OF THEM ALL?

WINNER: Men who wear popped collars 45%

"I'm cool...like Piolo Pascual cool"

Other votes:
Men who watch Gossip girl 31%
Men who carry handbags 18%
Men who wear pink shirts 1%

For a total of 100% and obviously, men who do them are indeed and considered as such.



"Unlike the National or Local May polls that we have, this one is fraud free!"




PS. Watch out for the next poll....

I HATE THE THINGS YOU SAY

Garbage..simply garbage...yes, like that April boy Regino tape you bought, just like the tickets from an LA Lopez concert you kept. I hate garbage. Lalo na yung garbage that comes out from one's mouth... Sabi sa Bible...

Matthew 15:16-18

"¹⁶"Are you still so dull?" Jesus asked them. ¹⁷"Don't you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? ¹⁸But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man 'unclean.'" --- I just had to connect..forgive me for that..haha..

Here are some words you hear, mmmm.. probably use just to make you sound or look cool:

"(i)STEADY LANG"

Ex. Man in Barong: "Musta summer mo pre?" Man in rags: "Steady lang pre..steady lang.."

This phrase is usually heard when you ask "Kumusta?" or "Whassup?" A simple "Okay lang" would do, but no..they HAD to come up with this. Steady what? why? where? Stupid.

"GOOD VIBES MAN..GOOD VIBES.."

Ex. (Stoned "dude" liking what he is seeing): "Good vibes pare...Good vibes!"

Either you hear this when someone is really stoned or drunk or when someone just wants to stand out from the crowd and sound "cool". * Just like my friend Marky would say "Good Vibes" my ass...if i punch you in the face would you call that "good vibes"?...hehe

"I KNOW, RIGHT!"

Ex. Stupid Student 1: "Man, the exam was really hard man.." REALLY Stupid Student 2: "I know, right! It`s harder than cement."

You know what? Shut the hell up. Usually heard in Starbucks where girls talk about stupid nothings or in any classroom wherein you are in the vicinity of a Fil-AM (Feeling American) or Amboy (Amoy Baboy).

"O-M-G!"

Ex. "O-M-G! It's the Jonas Brothers!"

Usually heard all over the place. Short for "Oh My God!" Typing it is acceptable, yeah I can tolerate that..but blurting it out with such fervor is not. Aartehan mo pa ba ang salita mo kapag mahuhulog na sa bangin ang kotse mo? What`s next? P-T-J? "Patay Tayo Jan"?


Next on this blog...The Jonas Brothers.

"O-M-G! I'm so excited! WTF? That's not Goldberg! PTJ!"

Preview of things to come....

"Jobert (the owner of this magnificent and educational blog site is my best friend... Even if I do not agree with some of his beliefs and ideas, he is still a friend indeed. Actually, he is more like my brother. Not the Cain and Abel type of relationship, but it`s more like the Vic Sotto and Tito Sotto kind of relationship a third member of our brotherhood will be introduced soon. But I must warn you, he is dangerous and violent.... Speaking of brothers... Jobert has mentioned to me that there is this group of "brothers" who think they are cool and is currently making Curly, Larry and Moe look bad..imagine that! Even Mario and Luigi are threatened... Alvin, Simon and Theodore are already digging holes. THIS MUST STOP! With the help from my "brother" Jobert, we will be telling you who they are..and why we hate them!" (Enter suspense music here)