I hate marathons

This entry is long overdue..No thanks to my day job. Yes, I do have a day job and it keeps me busy. It's more like a distraction in my blogging life.

ANYWAY, let me just say this: 

Running is the new Badminton.

You know how I feel about Badminton right?

Generally, running/marathon aren't really that bad. I mean, it's just running. But add along details like: "It's cool, it's the in thing now" makes me want to run without any clothes on.

I'd rather ride a bike than run.

You know why people are so into running? 

It's not because that its healthy, nor because its endorsed by a showbiz personality, like Derek Ramsey (no relation to the Pharaoh). People are going gaga over just because they just want to brag and show off. It's true, you heard it here first.

These people run because:

1. Just to be cool: Take their pictures taking while running, then post it in their social network sites like facebook, multiply, myspace and if you're still a loser, friendster.

2.They can't dance the running man.

3. No skills in basketball, volleyball or any team sport. Just run, no skills needed.

4.Getting ready for the zombie apocalypse. Hey, this can be useful when that happens.

5.They suck in badminton (which is a lousy sport).

6. Just to check out chicks, or men wearing short shorts.

7. To meet celebrities like Pacquiao, Derek Ramsey and Nonoy Zuniga..well Nonoy was not running, he was just watching.

8. They can't swim and go to Boracay and brag it in their facebook accounts, so they just run and brag about it.

9. Just to show off their new kicks..specifically, running shoes.

10.A lousy excuse to eat yogurt AND LOOK COOL even though it tastes like cat piss.

So there you go, 10 reason why this running fad is so popular nowadays. 

AND ALSO THIS:

YOU FREAKING PAY JUST TO RUN. 

ISNT THAT STUPID? 

CHARITY? 

CHARITY PEMPENGCO MY A$$.

RUNNING WILL NOT SAVE THE PLANET

RUNNING WILL NOT GIVE US WORLD PEACE

RUNNING WILL NOT CLEAN THE PASIG RIVER

Till the next Blog entry..Being a busy person, I gotta run.
(YES, PUN INTENDED)

Pacman knows

WTF moment #1

WTF MOMENT #1

PRETTY MUCH SELF EXPLANATORY

I HATE IT WHEN YOU STEP ON THAT YELLOW TILE

I hate it when you
step on the yellow tile in the MRT.

I'm bad(ing)ass! I break rules!

Not because I care for you, (it won't happen) but because its a green light for the guard to blow his horn...err..whistle, and for the stupid recording (yeah to warn stupid people like you NOT to step on the yellow tile!) to go on and on and on like that energizer bunny.

What will happen if I kick this guy?

"Maybe they're hardcore Marcos loyalists...as they have fun stepping on anything that's colored yellow---That one liner is so corny that I want to jump off the tracks...not!"

I HATE THE JONAS BROTHERS

My dog scribbled this on my computer.

Why hate on the Jonas Brothers?

1. They are not better than the Hanson brothers. Never. MMbop will never be outdone by any of their songs.

2. Because I`m not a pre-teen or a teen. I`m an adult...a cool adult.

3. They sing like girls..it would be okay to sing like girls, however, they are boys.

4. Just like Lebron James and Dwayne Wade, they are mere corporate puppets. Like it or not, they are what we call, teen commodities. Teen Money makers who do not have brains of their own.

5. They are fake. Faker than Milli Vanilli.

cocks

6. They are like the "Twilight" of music. All hype. Overrated. All bark and no bite. All pita bread, no shawarma beef.

7. A disgrace to Rock whenever they claim to be doing rock.

8. A disgrace to Pop. Imagine that.

9. Money before music = disaster.

10. Once separated, they are trash.

11. All image, talent..lacking.

12. Give them a few years, and the drugs/sex scandals/alcohol/crime will get the best of them. Guaranteed.

13. They sing like Miley Cyrus. Have you heard Miley Cyrus live? She demolished the song "Just stand up" together with real talented singers like Mary J Blige, Beyonce, etc. Expect the worst from these brothers.

14. They have this clean image..too clean if you ask me. It`s guaranteed FAKE. No thanks to Disney.

15. THEY ARE NOT HOT. And give it 10-15 years..at least one of them will go out the closet.

Just like Russell Brand would say: "Well done the Jonas Brothers. Each wear a ring to say they are not going to have sex; I'd take them more seriously if they wore it around their genitals."

why do they have their mouths wide open? damn!

HYPOCRITES

And what do we do to Hypocrites? We let them get beat up by one of our own... Introducing: HARVEY

Hello, my name is Harvey and I`m here to introduce my left and right to the Jobarns Brothers. I hate them because they are so cute. But, there can only be one. And that is me. Harvey the Hard one. This could be the first and last time you will see me here as I will be busy beating up the Jobarns brothers and be busy cleaning up septic tanks. Thank you for having me here.

XOXO,
Harvey. =)

"I therefore conclude..Listening to the Jonas brothers or Taylor Swift and even Miley Cyrus is deadlier compared to the Swine Flu or being trapped inside a closed room with a goat. If you have one of their songs in your I-pod or walkman, please do remove it right away."

I HATE THAT THING ON YOUR NECK

Even Emos get to wear em!

No, it's not your dead skin building up (Libag). It's your "color oriented" Neck Accessory.

Do you know what it's called?

It's a Keffiyeh also known as Shemagh.

It's not just the latest thing in fashion, it's also the latest eye sore.
Next to Pink shirts, Popped collars, and our favorite Shutter Shades.

So what is it?
Why are you wearing it?
Oh, you didn't know?
It figures, I can see you wearing that Che Guevara shirt. Do you even know who the guy is?

Correct! He is the brother or Tootsie! What a genius!

Let's go back to the uncool fashion storm that has hit the country like Katrina hit the US.

It's a SHEMAGH, Keffiyeh or your "stupid fashion statement" (So tell me, is this statement "I AM A MORON WHO WANT TO BE COOL"? )

People, read and learn...

It was Traditionally worn by Palestinian peasants, the keffiyeh became a symbol of

Palestinian nationalism during the Arab Revolt of the 1930...Increased sympathy and activism by certain Westerners toward Palestinians in the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict in the years of the Oslo Peace Accords and Second Intifada haveled to the wearing of keffiyehs as a sign of their solidarity with Palestine and the Palestinian people....

But now, some individuals wear them to be hip. Even if our country is so hot like pandesal left inside the compartment of your car. Or to be cool and to be like their idolized stars.

go watch your own sex tape!

Before, it was your Fauxhawk, now this? I should murder you already.

Can I whip your hip? and put some reality in your illusional coolness?

Can I simply strangle you with it?

Reality is this, it's not cool.
Hey, Mr. call center guy, it's not cool.
Hey, Mr. Gay guy, it's not cool
Hey, Mr. Self proclaimed fashionista, it's not cool.
Hey, Mr. Me-too, it's not cool.
Hey, Mr. Copycat, it's not cool.
Hey, Mr. Wannabe-trendsetter, it's not cool.

FAIL!

ONLY ONE GUY CAN WEAR A SCARF AND BE COOL

Cool as ice baby!

As for the Keffiyeh or Shemagh, Only one guy is cool in wearing this.

If you wear that in your concert, we will riot.

No, it's not Chris Brown.

BUT THIS GUY:

Yasser!

Too bad he's dead.

So what do I want you to wear? (nothing really)
I recommend a better neck accessory.
It will surely make you look like your're above everyone else.

Maybe it's time you hang out.

I HATE BADMINTON

If there is one sport that I will never love nor play, it is Badminton. From the root word "Bad", it is really that bad. It's not a contact sport so it's automatically BORING. The only thing you really get in contact with is with the ShuttleCOCK, so this game is automatically considered "GAY".

quit clowning around!

It's official: BADMINTON IS GAY

2 become 1

It makes you look gay and makes you love cocks. Women are the only ones who should play this sport, unless they are lesbians, they should be cleaning carpets on weekends. When the badminton craze hit the country, I said "more cocks will be hit this year.." and it was true, an average of 50,000 hits happen in one night alone. From call center agents/slaves to Managers to Government employees, almost everybody (with an arm), play(ed) badminton.

Who wear short shorts?

Office encounter:

Employee 1: Pare, san ka punta? bakit may raketa ka? Magtetennis ka ba?
Employee 2: Dude, pare.. I'm going to play Badminton later. Sama ka, it's cool pare.
Employee 1: Ha? Di ako marunong nyan eh, basketball na lang. Chaka, paano naging cool ang badminton?
Employee 2: Basketball? Sawa na ako sa balls dude, it's time to play with cocks naman. It's a sport for sosy people, it's the "in" sport now. You get to hangout with big people like the managers and supevisors, even artistas pare...It's fully airconditioned naman kaya it's cool, dude.
Employee 1: Cool? Aircondition? (gago pala to eh..) So playing badminton make you sosy?
Employee 2: Of course, dude! Only the elite play badminton!
Employee 1: Oh..di ako pwede jan..chaka kelangan ko umuwi ng bahay ng maaga at baka makalimutan nanaman magluto ng katulong namen dahil sa paglalaro ng badminton sa labas ng bahay..
Employee 2: Ahh..err...pare you heard na ba about this new movie coming? Dude, yung Twilight!
Employee 1: That movie sucks man.. It only appeals to teen girls, and the actual ‘plot’ is really idiotic.
Employee 1: Umm, let's talk about the NBA na lang..

Big Cocks will rock you.

But who really made this sport popular?
TV exposure? NO. A Hollywood movie? NO. Eat Bulaga? NO. A book! Harry Potter plays Badminton! NO. Piolo Pascual? NO. Sam Milby! NO.

Then who?

It's your dependable, underpaid Maid/Helper/Katulong. Our maid was the best player in badminton in our subdivision. She plays with other katulongs after doing her chores. They play outside, in front of the house to the delight of Construction workers and "boys". The funny thing is, there is no such thing as a score. They end the game when they are called back by their employers to cook dinner or when it's too dark for them to see the cocks.

Even Badminton was played by 16th century maids

For women only indeed

Conclusion: Women are the only ones who should play Badminton, Men...please stay away..if you love cocks, go for sabong.