I HATE THIS NURSERY RHYME

Technically, It's not a "NURSERY RHYME". But kids that age already know this piece..

-1 2 3..asawa ni marie, araw-gabi walang panty...-

I'm not Mike Chan*, but I can attract girls like blood attract sharks!

OOoohhkay... big deal? What is the world teaching the youth of today and yesterday?


Just thinking about it...kaya walang panty yung asawa ni marie, kasi lalake yung asawa ni Marie...sa tingin nyo? (I need to be "bilingual" so that other kids from our beloved country can understand me too.)

labo naman ng gumawa ng rhyme na to...

Hopefully, the creator also included this in his children's rhyme..

"isa.. dalawa.. tatlo.. apat, naligo ako sa dagat at nabasa ang aking balat..."

"apat, lima, anim...kumain ako ng hilaw na mangga at ang asim.."

"anim, pito, walo...hindi nagpapagupit ang kalbo..."

eh stating the obvious naman yung "1 2 3..asawa ni marie, araw-gabi walang panty..."

siguro ginawa lang yun ng composer nun para lang legal na mabanggit ang panty noon. Kasi conservative pa mga tao noon.

Kaya kapag nagsabi ka ng "panty" eh sikat ka na or cool ka...or may chance ka manalo ng palanca award.

pero sa totoo hindi. ni- hindi nga alam sino nagcompose nun eh! hahahaha!


I simply call this..FAILURE.


"I have one for you Jobert! And it goes a little something like this: "I'm a little d.... short and stout..this is my handle and you don't need to go out.." Oh, and this one too: "eight, nine, ten.. I do not brush my teeth so now I don't have ipin." That would be more educational, am I right, Jobert?"


*host of Channel 13`s "Chowtime Na!"

I Hate it when you carry your girlfriend's handbag!

There is nothing (well, not really) that I loathe more than seeing men carry their Girlfriend's handbag.

First of all, it's not being a gentleman. Believe me, women have used this propaganda to enslave the masculine race. I may sound like a chauvinistic pig, but this is reality. I'd rather be called a pig than be a liar. (yes!)

This image has brought new meaning to "Iron Man"

Fellas, are you familiar with this line:

"Be a gentleman and carry my bag, please?"

Gets 'em every time!

Reality Check: Carrying your GF's handbag will NOT make you a gentleman. It won't even make you look good. Your friends will laugh at you. Your dog will disown you. And people you do not even know will look at you with pity.

Trust me, with matching pink-popped-collared shirt. You could be mistaken as the next Carson Kressley, Thom Filicia or Jai Rodriguez.

Heck, even without the pink shirt on, you'd still look gay with a capital G...More like "G" as in Gago.

Add a handbag to your "accessory" and you're a certified H-sexual.

Ladies, if you can't carry your own bag. Just don't bring any. You'll only make your boyfriend look weak: the failure of failures, the weakest weakling, the softest cotton. You do get the picture I suppose... Sure, treat your men like slaves, but not in public. Give him the respect he needs..err deserves even for just a few minutes or at least when you go out and date. Siya naman ang magbabayad ng kakainin nyo eh dba?

Free Men from slavery!

Since the beginning of time (well, not really), women have been clamoring for equality: The right to vote, gender equality and empowerment of women (not in the Spice Girls kind). But having your girl, carry her bag for you IN PUBLIC is not a good idea. There is no equality here. This is blatant slavery and oppression. Women, you have your own space in the MRT and We don't, so stop having men carry your bag and stop riding with us in the MRT!

"I would rather carry sacks of Rice or sacks of Horse shit than carry a woman's handbag."--Jobert Balbastro

"I remember the time when I had this girlfriend, she would always forcibly make me carry her Luwi Vattong handbag. I felt proud before because I have never held such an expensive bag. After a few months, I found out the bag was fake. What broke my heart was when I found out my Girlfriend was also fake."

I HATE VALENTINE'S DAY!

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